Dec 28, 2014

Dec 21, 2014

I wish

Don't know why I feel like crying today.
Maybe because I'm not so well.
You know, when someone is sick they definitely want their special someone to take care of them. To be pampered by them.

I wish. I could turn back time. Asking for his hands from his mom. Maybe if I do that last time. I'll know how his mom feel about me. Whether she likes me or not. I'll try to convince her that  I really want her son.

Oh my. Why I still remember the past. It's so not easy for me to move on.


Dec 17, 2014

Don't be



Don't be too clingy.

Don't be too emotional.

Dec 12, 2014


Bahagia rasa bila tengok baby org lain.

Bila dah tengok, senyum sorang2.

And then tetiba mengalir airmata. Wondering, when is my turn to have those cute little baby.

I want them too.

Nak rasa there's a life in my tummy.
Nak rasa caring for them.
Taking care of them.

I just have to be patience.

Dec 3, 2014

Not good enough

Am I not good enough to be recommended?


Dec 2, 2014

Happy Birthday to Me

Alhamdulillah. .I'm officially 27 today.
Thanks omma appa for having me as your daughter. .
I'm so thankful & so bless with everything I have..
And what I don't have & can't have, I wish them happiness.


Morning Love!

Today I'm officially 27 !
And I'm still Single!

Isn't that great?
Oh *

Nov 13, 2014

Why can't I

I'm tired searching for the right guy.
I just want someone so ordinary like you. Yang akan care for me. Only me. Yang sincere. Ikhlas mencintai sy.

I want you. But I can't. I will never have you.

Because you don't want me anymore.

Things doesn't go right in my life. I am a mess. Really messed up.

Nov 4, 2014


Memang duit adalah segala-galanya. Tapi selagi sy sndiri bkerja. Sy xfikir hidup akan susah selagi kita bgantung harap & tawakkal pada Allah.

Yang penting, sy perlukan seseorg yg boleh jaga sy & bagi kbahagiaan pada sy.

Money is not everthing for me. Selagi mana kita rajin.

Nov 1, 2014


I don't know why
I love wearing your t-shirt

Oct 12, 2014


Next time I won't making a promise if I can't fulfill it.
The sense of guilty tu rasa macam nak buried myself in a grave je.
It is really haunted.

Oct 10, 2014


Betapa beruntungnya kamu ada ayah yang sentiasa prihatin pada anak-anaknya.

Betapa beruntungnya kamu ada ayah yang sentiasa setia dengan ibumu.

Betapa beruntungnya kamu.

Betapa beruntungnya kamu ada lelaki yang bersungguh-sungguh mahu jadikan kamu isterinya.

Betapa beruntungnya kamu dapat mengahwini orang yang kamu sukai.

Betapa beruntungnya kamu dikurniakan cahaya mata yang dapat menyerikan kehidupanmu & ibubapamu.

Betapa beruntungnya kamu.

Betapa beruntungnya kamu.

Betapa cemburunya aku.

A husband

I want a husband who will do anything for his family. Without us asking.
And we won't ask.

A husband who will love his family so very dearly.

And won't leave us in uncomfortable situation.

I want someone who really care.


Oct 7, 2014

How can I easily forget

Your eyes, nose, lips
It haunts my memory
I can't forget you if I try
Feels like I'm losing my mind

Sep 21, 2014

I cry

You know what I love doing these days?

I love going out alone and driving alone.

While driving alone I can express my true feeling without having to feel any embarrassment.

I can cry. A lot of crying makes me feel better. But I'm doing it too much lately. They're not doing any good aren't they.

Sep 20, 2014

'Cause I'm not fine at all

5 Seconds of Summer - Amnesia

I drove by all the places we used to hang out 
getting wasted
I thought about our last kiss, 
how it felt the way you tasted
And even though your friends tell me 
you're doing fine

Are you somewhere feeling lonely 
even though he's right beside you?
When he says those words that hurt you, 
do you read the ones I wrote you?
Sometimes I start to wonder, 
was it just a lie?
If what we had was real, how could you be fine?

'Cause I'm not fine at all

I remember the day you told me you were 
I remember the make-up running down your 
And the dreams you left behind you didn't
need them
Like every single wish we ever made
I wish that I could wake up with amnesia
And forget about the stupid little things
Like the way it felt to fall asleep next to you
And the memories I never can escape

'Cause I'm not fine at all

The pictures that you sent me they're still 
living in my phone
I'll admit I like to see them, I'll admit I feel alone
And all my friends keep asking why you're not 

It hurts to know you're happy, yeah, it hurts that 
you've moved on
It's hard to hear your name when I haven't seen 
you in so long

It's like we never happened, was it just a lie?
If what we had was real, how could you be fine?

'Cause I'm not fine at all

I remember the day you told me you were 
I remember the make-up running down your 
And the dreams you left behind you didn't 
need them
Like every single wish we ever made
I wish that I could wake up with amnesia
And forget about the stupid little things
Like the way it felt to fall asleep next to you
And the memories I never can escape

If today I woke up with you right beside me
Like all of this was just some twisted dream
I'd hold you closer than I ever did before
And you'd never slip away
And you'd never hear me say

I remember the day you told me you were leaving
I remember the make-up running down your face
And the dreams you left behind you didn't need them
Like every single wish we ever made
I wish that I could wake up with amnesia
And forget about the stupid little things
Like the way it felt to fall asleep next to you
And the memories I never can escape

'Cause I'm not fine at all
No, I'm really not fine at all
Tell me this is just a dream

'Cause I'm really not fine at all



Kenapa saya selalu ingatkan awak?
Saya tak nak ingat awak lagi.
Saya tak nak.

Mungkin awak dah bahagia sekarang.
Saya masih lagi ingatkan awak.
Saya tak nak.

Saya tak nak. Ingat awak lagi.


Sep 17, 2014

I hate

I hate. When I see. Baby.

I feel so sad. Tears will drop.

I want one. Definitely want it.

A husband. A baby. Complete.


Sep 8, 2014

Principle 2

Never rely on man for money.

I just need someone to makes me feel secure. Someone who will be there for me everytime I need him.

Silent & Comfort.

Sep 4, 2014


Today is my parents anniversary.
While wishing for them, why does me, deep down in my heart I'm feeling trembling.

Slowly, tears keep dropping down my face.

I miss you.

Aug 28, 2014

Most embarrassing

The most embarrassing moment was when you finally ask your mother to find you a spouse saying that you desperately wants to get married.

Oh no!

Aug 19, 2014


The elders is thinking bad about you.
They say you're a liar.
I can't do anything.

I don't want to think or say bad about you, about others.
Like you always tell me to.

I just know that everything you gave me was sincere.


Aug 13, 2014

Patah hati

Saya rasa saya dah patah hati.
I feel it is hard for me to fall in love again.

I don't want to care and I'm not hoping.

I want it to come to me. I don't want to find it anymore.

I'm too tired.

Saya xnak rasa sakit.
Saya xnak rasa sedih.
Saya xnak org buat saya menangis.

I'm just too tired.

Aug 5, 2014


How can I talk to you when you don't even want to talk to me?



Do you know how 'Kosong' I feel right now.


It was so annoying. 
I am so pissed off.


I love Myself

Have read this on my FB.
Someone posted it and I want to share.

Aug 4, 2014

Poor my little 'ple

I terAccident last week at Bentong on my way to kampong.

I dah cuba drive dengan selamat and secermat mungkin. Tapi mungkin Allah mahu menguji tahap kesabaran hambaNya ini. Mahu menguji dengan sedikit dugaan, bila dirasakn yang hambaNya ini terlalu senang.


Alhamdulillah.  Now my 'ple has back to normal. And it cost 720 to repair him.

Sorry 'ple. I will try my best to protect you. You are what I have for my future.

Thank you

Thanks to you.
My weight is now 55kg. It is a healthy weight for me ya know!

Thanks to you.
I really want to be fair&pretty nowadays.

Thanks to you.
Really. I mean it.


When others busy talking & planning about marriage. I keep myself busy with all sort of things that I like, things that I love doing.

I don't want to get jealous with others happiness.  But sometimes I just can't help it.

That's why I always try to not mind their business.


Aug 2, 2014


I believe that someone someday will complete my life...

And if not, I will wait him in Jannah.


Aug 1, 2014

Principle 1

Don't think & talk bad about others.

Jul 31, 2014

Jul 26, 2014


May Allah swt forgive us for the sins we make.
I wish u happy.

Jul 19, 2014


Today I gave him my last msg.
Saying that I'm sorry and can accept the fact that he wasn't meant to be mine. I did say thanks to him for all he gave me all this 7 years. And I want to be his friend if he want me too.

But I know he will not reply my msg anymore. So I should stop disturb someone's only son. It will be hard for him if I continue acting pathetic.

Oh my!
How to mend my broken heart?

Jul 18, 2014


Dia dah ada pengganti.
Maybe a lot better than me.

o Allah.
why am I so upset?
I should be happy for him.

He finally got what he want.

Oh my.


Jun 4, 2014


After that day, when the meeting was cancel. He not even call me & text me.

Must be because he never really loved me after all this 7 years we've been together. Just what Aria in Pretty Little Liars said when she know that Ezra only used her for his books. When her friends said to her about not helping her when she was in danger all this time. Then she ans 'It's simple, he never really loved me'

Or maybe he do love me. But man's love was never really so passion than woman's love. That's why it is easier for him to forget everything.

I can't blame him.

p/s-> I am sorry.

Jun 1, 2014

Bye2 May

I may start a new life

May 29, 2014

Not mine

He's not mine anymore...
We break up.
& what makes me sad is I'm the one who ask for it.

I cannot stand his mother doesn't like me.
Not exactly doesn't like me, but she doesn't want his son to marry peninsular woman because of distance.
She might be afraid that her son will leave her.
Staying far from her because he's the only son.

I love him.
I don't know if I can find a good guy like him.

........insyaAllah. ..

All I want to do now is seeking for His Blessing.  InsyaAllah.
He knows whats the best for me.


I don't really know what to feel.

Apr 20, 2014

What should I do?

I don't want to be a burden to anyone.


Apr 18, 2014


I don't really like babies.
Rs sakit hati&nk pecah kepala je klu dengar dorg nangis.

Sejak akhir2 ni.
Bila tgk babies.
Aku rasa bahagia sgt.
Tenang jiwa when I see them.


When can I have mine?

Next year.

Mar 17, 2014


What people fear the most is making a mistakes.

But without mistakes, we won't be able to face reality.

Mar 10, 2014


I try to saves money as much as I can..

It turn out to be like this everytime I want to do it...

It is a little 'Dugaan' for me, so I shouldn't cry...

Is he?

Love me?

Still in love with me?

Or not?

Jan 23, 2014


Sabar itu separuh daripada Iman.

Sabar itu satu kemanisan.


Jan 21, 2014


I live everyday with hope.
Hope that she will bless us.

Hope that our hardship will be paid.

Hoping that one day I will get married happily with their blessing.


Jan 20, 2014


I cry again last night because of what my mom said...
Mungkin ini adalah balasan buatku sebab selalu buat ibuku menangis keranaku sebelum ini..

Aku hanya ingin restu dia.
Tidak sama sekali aku mahu menderhaka.

Diam. Diam.
Aku yakin Diam dan Doa akan lembutkan hati dia untuk merestui kami.


May Allah ease our way to Jannah.

Jan 16, 2014



Syukran ya Allah....

Jan 15, 2014


Biasa harga tinted cermin sisi myvi
Berape ye?

Nak sediakan budget..

Jan 14, 2014


All I want is the blessing...

Sabar itu adalah satu kemanisan.
Walaupun aku tidak sempurna.

Jan 12, 2014


Dia tak bersungguh..

Adakah ini ujian untuk aku terus bersabar?